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Any hunting related jokes you guys would like to share?

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  • Any hunting related jokes you guys would like to share?

    Any hunting related jokes you guys would like to share?

  • #2
    By the way, we've all heard the one about the hunter making sure his friend is dead.

    Comment


    • #3
      A couple of squirrel hunters come across a growling grizzly bear, and one of them sits down, takes off his boots and starts to lace up a pair of running shoes. His partner asks what he thinks he's doing because they can't outrun the bear. The answer comes back, "I don't have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun YOU!"

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      • #4
        Some men go on a hunting trip and separate into pairs. That evening one hunter, Sam, returned to camp alone toting a 12 point buck. "Where’s George?" one of the men asked, noticing that Sam had returned alone."
        He is about 6 miles back. He tripped and broke his ankle. I left him there cause I figured aint nobody bout to steal him."

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        • #5
          What is the difference between a Country Zoo and a City Zoo? In the City Zoo the name is on the cage. In a Country Zoo the Receipt is on the cage.

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          • #6
            A stranger walks into a country bar. The locals eye him suspiciously. Finally the Bartender walks over. Where you from, he asks? Oh I'm from the city, was the reply. What do you do, the Bartender asked? I'm a Taxidermist he answered. What's that? I mount dead animals the Stranger replied. The Bartender paused for a moment turned to his friends and replied "it's all right boy's he's one of us".

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            • #7
              What do you get when you take 3 new, N.J. deer hunters out for their first hunt and a deer runs past your truck?
              A blown out windshield!

              unfortunately not a joke, still funny, though!

              Comment


              • #8
                I heard this True Story from my Uncle in Upstate NY. Goes to prove Fact is Funnier than Fiction. At a DOC Check Station 3 City hunters were stopped. They had an animal tied to the roof of their truck. Properly tagged. The problem arose on inspection when it was discovered that it was a Calf. Contributing to this was a lack of the English language. The Hunter was adamant about his Doe Permit. The exchange went on for a half hour. The Hunter "A Buck, a Fawn, a Doe" the Officer "a Bull, a Cow, a Calf was the reply. It was funny for a short while till the challenged Hunter found out how much a Calf costs.

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                • #9
                  Well Carl That's Not the way I herd that Story 58Yrs ago..Carl goes Hunting for the first time,His friends say if its Big,Dark skin with Horns..Shoot! It took Carl 2Hr to drag and mount it on the Cars Roof, He stops at a Game Check Station...feeling SO Proud..When a Farmer jumped out of the Troopers Car and said, Hey That's My Prize Bull!$2,000 later Carl said to his friends that's some expensive Deer meat.1952+/-

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                  • #10
                    Carl -

                    ..."mount dead animals?"

                    Sounds like Deliverence country to me.

                    Butt ennyhow, it clears the way for this'n:

                    Two guys were sitting in a deer stand and one of them had to urinate, and when he whipped it out, a rattlesnake bit it on the head.

                    He goes running back and tells his buddy what happened.

                    "OK, I'll call the doc."

                    He gets out his cell phone and explains the situation to an MD who tells him that he's gotta cut crossmarks and suck the poison out.

                    "What did he say?"

                    "Doc says you're gonna die!"

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                    • #11
                      Here's a corny one for ya:
                      Two biologists go to alaska to study mating habits of a pair of grizzlys. One from the Czeck the other from Germany. After a few days the rangers hadn't heard back from the scientists and go looking for them. When they come to their camp site they see a big female grizzly with blood on her. They shoot the bear and examine her stomach and realize she had eaten the the German. But there is no sign of the other biologist. The one ranger looks at the other and says you know what this means, the Czeck's in the male.

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                      • #12
                        Treestand the only difference was my Uncle's story was true. He did not BS and the story was vet-ed separately by a Officer on site.
                        Bayouwoof the nice thing about jokes the are completely adjustable to race, color, creed or [email protected] orientation. Feel free to stage it in a NY [email protected] Bar.

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                        • #13
                          One More Joke. This is not an Outdoor Joke. But I have found it usually always gets a laugh from men; not so much from women.
                          A woman goes down stairs to see her husband crying in the kitchen. What's the matter honey she asks. He replies; Do you remember when you were 16 and I was 18. Your Dad caught us making love on the couch. It was go to jail for 20 years or get married. Yes I do honey but why are you crying. "I would have got out today" was his reply.

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                          • #14
                            Herr Huber -

                            Thet one is entirely humorous!!!

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