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Back in Washington, before I got married and moved back to Bayou La Batre,L.A.(Lower Alabama) I shot an unidentifiable subspecies of Canada goose. Back there ya gotta study a brochure and be able to identify each of the seven subspecies that winter in that area. The attractive young Ranger lady said that many geese had moved out of their traditional breeding grounds for a variety of reasons and the biggest difference in geese anymore is where they go to breed. So she weighed it, measured the wings, measured the wing aspect ratio, measured the overall length, and the length of the bill, taking notes all he while, and marked that it wuz a male. I asked how she knew and she said, "He actually has a little penis in there", looking at me intently. So here is the question: Should I have asked her out? Any help will be appreciated.
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You probably shot big foots pet goose.
Yes, if she can identify a pxxis blindfolded, you should have asked her out. -
Should she also have been able and willing to CLEAN ducks and fish, you should have never have let her get away.Comment
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If she was intrigued by a little one, you may have even stood a chance!! LOL just kidding...Comment
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Did she measure the neck? Many of the unidentifiable subspecies of Canada geese turn out to be swans.Comment
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Prey-Hunt-Work -
Actually, you're half right. It hazza tattoo on it that says, "Shorty". Butt when I take one of those little blue pills they advertise in Field and Stream, it says:
Shorty's Bar and Grill Chattanooga Tennessee!Comment
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99 -
The swans that come here are white and as big as a Christmas turkey. Thirty+ lbs. and a wingspan of ten feet. Their necks are as long as a goose.
It is one of my favorite parts of the Fall Ritual, to hear them hooting and see two dozen of them flying up The Gorge in a line or vee.
It puts it into perspective when there is a goose or Mallard flying with 'em.
Merry Xmas, My Friend.Comment
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You should have worked into the conversation the fact that you are afraid to go swimming for fear that you'll be dragged down by your massive, godlike pen!s. That usually gets a reaction from awe to awkward.Comment
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contry -
I just don't want to attract the attention of the kind of people who find Phil Robertson to be objectionable. They'll be lined up down the street when I go out in the morning. Like my dawg, I believe in modesty. You'd never even know he had one until company comes!Comment
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And then...
Aiyeeeee!
It's a blue-veined warhead!
Humpetyhumpetyhumpety.
EEEeeeeEEEEEeeeee!
Git, Ah say, Git offa mah laig, boy!
etc.
And I have to act disgusted and put newspapers down in the washroom and throw him in there behind his inflatable artificial human leg. He is unfazed, cuz he has already created quite a disturbance and that can't be taken away.Comment
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I think you are helpless.Comment
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Nobody asked you, Troll! This is a shared joke among friends.
And you want to bust in and share your negativity and depression.
Others have called you out for this.
I'll not have a conversation with someone who is insane.
Write what ye want and I'll not read it.
Next time you want to wax negative about someone, write it down on paper and take it to a psychiatrist!Comment
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Hey! What happened to the Christmas spirit around here?
We know there is a white Santa and a black Santa.
Isn't there room for a Cajun Santa?Comment
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Gees, I was just kidding! A play on words, that's all. Sorry I forgot to add the smiley. My mistake. Merry Christmas.Comment
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